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The Discovery of My Submissiveness

Part 11

I ran back to my room as fast as I could.  I wanted to scream in my embarrassment.  As soon as I shut and locked the door I had a strange thought.  I was willing to crawl out of my house on my hands and knees, naked and on a leash.  Suck Alans dick while we drove through Wendys.  Expose myself to the world and the internet.  Yet, I was so totally embarrassed when my own brother, someone who actually wouldnt judge me, saw me naked.  Why was that strange to me?  Was it because I needed to keep my dignity when it came to family?  I didnt care what the world thought of me, but I surely did care when it came to my family.  We were close and happy.

I wrapped myself in my robe and with a bright red face, I left my room and went back into the bathroom to take a shower.  John was in his room.  I took my shower and went back to my room.  Alan had called while I was in the shower.  I quickly called him back.

       “Hello?”  He sounded like he had just woken up.

“Hi, sweety!”  I was in a cheerful mood even though my body was aching and sore, especially my most sensitive parts.

“How you feeling today?”  He sounded really happy.

“Sore, and happy as hell.”  I was smiling.

“Yeah, me too.  You are so totally awesome.”

“No, you are so totally awesome.”

“Mind if I go see you in a while?”

“John is here, but sure.”

“Ok, Ill get us some lunch.  See you in a little, baby.”

“Kay, bye.”

I made myself up and fixed my hair.  I went to my closet and thought about what I could wear.  I decided on a navy blue short cotton skirt and a white tank top and a pair of tennis shoes.  I liked not wearing underwear so much that I didnt even think about putting them on anymore.

I waited patiently in my room listening to music.  John showed up about an hour later.

I opened the door and let him in.  He gave me a nice wet kiss before he even said hello.  He had a glow about him I hadnt seen before.  He had an angelic aura about him that made me see him as supernatural.  He carried a bag of McDonalds with him. 

As soon as we sat down at the kitchen table to eat, John came out of his room and went in to meet us.

“Oh, hey man, whats up?”  He said to Alan.

“Nothing, bro, just having some lunch.  Want some?”

“Its ok, you guys go ahead.”

“No, man, I brought you some burgers and fries cuz Laura said you were here.”

“Serious?  Thanks man.”  John sat down and started eating with us.  I felt sort of uncomfortable knowing that he had seen me naked earlier in the day.  I tried to shrug it off but John had to tease me about it.

“Oh, Alan, I saw something that was meant for you today?”  He had an evil grin on his face.  He wouldnt dare.

“What do you mean?”  Alan responded curiously.

John looked at me with a smile and jerked his head like he was pointing at me with his chin.  “Tell him, Laura.”

“No.  I dont wanna tell him.”  I felt my face turn a bright red.

“Dude, I wake up all hung over and shit.  I had to take this major piss.  I walk out of my room and…”  He giggled and laughed.  “She was standing right there in the fuckin hallway all naked.”

Alan looked surprised and then looked at me.  “No shit.”  He acted like he hadnt seen me naked before.

“You shouldve seen the look on her face, dude.”  He opened his eyes real wide and let his jaw drop wide open.  “She ran away screaming.”  He laughed so hard I thought he was going to pee his pants.

Alan looked at me and smiled before he laughed with John.

I shifted my body on the seat and felt a squishy feeling between my legs.  This wasnt pussy juice.  It was thicker and sticky.  What the hell was this?  I stood up.  Shit! No! No! Not now!

“I gotta go to the bathroom, be right back.”  I said as I ran to the bathroom.  I lifted my skirt to see what it was and shit if I hadnt started my period.  Dammit!  I usually felt cramps and bloated when it was getting close, but this came without warning.  When I thought about it, I figured it was because I was exercising my stomach and that was probably why I didnt feel it.  I couldnt explain it fully.  I was only about a day earlier than usual.  I went into my room and put on a tampon, wiped myself, put on a pair of panties which actually felt pretty good, and then checked my skirt for stains.  Luckily there werent any.

I casually made my way out of my room back into the kitchen where Alan and John were laughing and eating.

“Everything ok baby?”  Alan said as his smile half left.

The soreness between my legs caused me to walk sort of bull legged.

“Im fine.”

“We thought you got mad at us and ran away for messin with you.”  John said.

“No, I just had to go to the bathroom.”

“Then why are you walking so funny?”  John had a smirk.

Alan gave me a look of surprise like what if John figured us out.  He really looked worried.

“Im ragging ok?  God!  I get no fuckin privacy in this house.  Alan, lets go to the park or something.”  I grabbed his hand and pulled him out the front door.  “He pisses me off so bad sometimes.”

“Are you really on the rag now?” He smiled with a touch of grossed out spread on his face.

I nodded and blushed.  We walked to his car and got inside.  Once inside, Alan turned to me with a smile on his face.

“Does your period really make you walk weird?  Cuz the other girls dont really.”

“No, it doesnt make me walk funny.” I was getting aggravated at all the personal questions.

“So why ARE you walking funny?”

I looked at him impatiently.  “You really have to ask me that question?  Like you really dont know?”

“You mean…  I… I did that?”

I just blushed and went limp.  “Can we, like stop talking about this?”

Alan gave a healthy laugh before pulling out.  I know it wasnt only him that made me so sore, but it made him feel so good about himself that I didnt care to tell him the truth.  We drove over to the secluded park we had been to the day before.  We parked and walked to a park bench.  Just as I sat down Alan put his hand on my bare thigh.

“Im gonna tell you something and I dont want you to freak out or anything.”

“Sure, whatever.”

“These past few days with you have been the best days of my entire life.  I never ever thought I would be as happy as I am when Im with you.  And when Im not with you, Im always thinking about you.  Your face is like, imprinted on my brain and I cant let it go.”  He took a deep breath.  I wanted to respond to his compliments, but I listened patiently.  “I think… No, I know that….”  He paused again.

“Im so totally in love with you.”  He continued before I could say anything.  “Before you say anything, I know its only been a few days.  And I know were young and probably dont even know what love is.  But I know one thing.  These feelings I have for you in my heart are real and I dont plan on ever fighting them.  You make me happy and you keep me warm at night.  You brighten my day with your smile and I want you to be mine forever.”

Oh my God!  Those words made me melt right in the middle of the park.  They were so beautiful and so heartfelt that it put a giant lump in my throat that grew with every word he said until I exploded in tears.  When he was done, I was crying like a baby and I gave him the most heartfelt hug I could possibly give.

“Thank you so much.  I never thought Id fall in love either.  But you make me feel so good about myself.  Every day you make me feel pretty and wanted.  Im so totally in love with…*choke*…with you too.”  I held him close to me again as I had never broken down in tears due to happiness before.  We were in love and it felt so real and so genuine.  I was never letting this one go. 

“Whew.”  He pretended to wipe his forehead of sweat. “I was so scared that you were gonna freak out and run away.”

I laughed while wiping my tears away.  “No, Im too far from home.”  That made him laugh also.

We sat there for hours talking and joking around.  After a while, I got a phone call that ruined our good time.  It was my mom.  They were home and she was going to teach me how to make tortillas, chili, and other stuff so I needed to go home right away.  She told me to invite Alan over for dinner so he could taste my food.

We went straight home from there.  Alan dropped me off and told me he would be by later that night for dinner.  I gave him a long soft kiss before I left his car and it felt so good telling him that I loved him.  It sort of made me feel so full of life.

I went inside the house.  My mom and dad were resting in the living room waiting for me.  Dad got up when he saw what I was wearing and gave me a check over.  He looked like he wanted to say something but held back from commenting.  He looked a little frustrated at that.

“Let me change first, mom, before we start, ok?”

“Go ahead.”  She responded with a smile.

I went into my room and changed into a pair of shorts.  I did it mostly for my dad than anything else.  I could hear them talking in the living room.  Dad didnt sound very happy and mom was trying to calm him down.  At least I had her there to protect me.  I wished I was able to hear what they were saying, but all I could hear were mumbles.

I came out and mom took me into the kitchen to teach me how to make tortillas.  She didnt have an actual recipe for them, she just poured in some flour and other ingredients into a large bowl.  She let me do most of the work.  I had no idea how much work it took to make homemade tortillas.  It wasnt really that hard, it was just time consuming. 

I will always remember my first tortilla.  It was too thick and it wasnt even round, but I was so proud of myself for making it.  Just after I finished making it, I called dad in the kitchen to taste it fresh off the comal

He came in with a big smile like a dog getting a treat.  He laughed when he saw it. 

“It looks like Texas, hita.”  He laughed at the crooked tortilla while spreading some butter on it.  He took a big bite and paused after the third bite.

“These are delicious, hita, good job!”  He said as he munched down the rest of it.

The comment made me proud.  I had always wanted to learn this and not only was I doing it, I did it well.  This was turning out to be one of the best days I had ever had.  The smile never left my face.  It took me close to two hours to finally finish the whole batch of tortillas.  I had made about three dozen.

Just as I had finished, mom wanted to show me how to make red chili.  New Mexican style chili like I had grown up eating.  The beans were simmering on the stove and the house smelt like my grandmas on a Sunday afternoon.  The odors always brought me back to when she was alive, God how I missed her.

Alan showed up shortly after.  I let him in and proudly handed him a tortilla and the butter.  “Here, wanna try my tortillas?”

“Of course I do.”  He said with a smile.  He didnt use any butter.  He just folded it and took a bite.  The look on his face was priceless and remains in my head to this day.  He closed his eyes and it looked like every muscle in his body relaxed like he was melting.  “Mmm, these are awesome, Laura.  Thank you.”  He said sincerely.

My dad called him into the living room as mom and I finished cooking.  They seemed comfortable together.  It was refreshing to see them getting along so well.  It meant a lot to me that dad accepted him.

The chili was easy to make and soon dinner was ready.  We called them to dinner and they happily got up.  We sat together and ate our chili and beans.  I was excited that they really enjoyed it.  They were full of compliments.  My day was getting better by the minute.

After dinner, I helped mom clean up while the men sat in the den watching TV.  I felt like a grown woman doing these things.  Taking care of my man and feeding him and making him happy filled my soul.  It was my soul purpose, my destiny.

After cleaning, mom and I sat in the den with the men and watched a movie.  Alan and I just held hands while mom and dad were cuddled together.  I wanted to do stuff with Alan that I wouldnt have dared done in front of my parents.  But I was a good girl and behaved.  As soon as the movie was over Alan asked if they would like him to go buy us all ice cream.

Mom and dad looked at each other and smiled big.

“Sure, I could go for some ice cream right now.”  Mom said happily.  Dad agreed.

They let me go with him.  We jumped in the car and as soon as I got in, my hand found his crotch.  Alan just smiled and drove on.

“I wanted to touch you so bad in there.  Am I bad?”

Alan laughed.  “No, youre good.  Damn good.”  He laughed again.

“Whats so funny?”  I said as I pulled my hand away from him manhood.

“Nothing, its just that… I thought your were… you know.”

“Oh, that.  That doesnt mean we cant do anything.”

“Oh really?”  He smiled again.

“Pull over, let me show you.”

Alan pulled the car over in the store parking lot.  I unbuttoned and unzipped his pants and pulled his underwear off.  I leaned over and pulled that gorgeous snake from his pants.  I leaned in and took a long sniff of his manly smell that I adored so much.  I loved the musky smell his crotch had.  It was like an aphrodisiac to me.  It drove me crazy.

I stared at it for a short while adoring the entire thing and rubbing it gently.  God how I loved his penis.  I loved everything about it.  I loved the shape.  I loved the length.  I loved the way the head swelled on the tip.  I loved how his balls pressed out of his pants so tight and so big.  I loved how hard it got every time I touched it and rubbed it like this.  I worshipped it.

I opened my mouth as soon as it was hard and long and his tip swelled up.  I wrapped my lips tightly around the tip and started rubbing my tongue all around it.  It made him jerk his hips and gasp.  He started rubbing my head almost like I was a small puppy cuddled in his lap.  That made me feel even more submissive and in more need to please it.

I started to bob my head slowly up and down allowing his tip to lightly tap the back of my throat.  My fingers fondled his balls at the same time which seemed to drive him crazy as he kept jerking and twitching with pleasure.

It was my pleasure to take care of him like this.  I loved this boy with all my heart and I wanted to keep him happy forever.  I had dedicated myself to doing whatever it took to make him happy all the time.  He was my life.

He didnt take long to start the familiar moan.  I knew he was getting close so I started bobbing faster and rubbing my tongue harder underneath his tool.  I wasnt going to stop until he showed me he was pleased by squirting his man fluid in my mouth.  I loved this boy so much, I was going to suffer the foulness of the cum and swallow it just to make him happy.

I felt his shaft start to jerk quickly.  I continued at the same pace as I had read online.  It said that once it starts jerking, to keep the same pace and do nothing different so he doesnt lose his climax.  Finally, he shot such a hard load into my mouth that it hit the back of my throat and dribbled down it a little.  I kept my mouth tightly shut around the shaft so I wouldnt spill any of it.  Unfortunately, I couldnt swallow with my mouth open like that without biting down a little and I didnt want to hurt him with my teeth so I kept the foulness of cum in my mouth until he stopped jerking. 

I kept my face pressed against his balls as he finished.  When I knew he was done, I slowly sucked and kept my lips tight around the shaft so I wouldnt spill any on my way up.  I large drop fell on his pants as his manhood fell limp out of my mouth.  It was still jerking a little.  I held my breath and took a long hard swallow.  It didnt taste any better than the time before, but it made me feel better about making him cum.  It was a sacrifice I was willing to make.  I leaned forward again and used my tongue to lick up the drops of cum that fell on his jeans.  When I was done, I looked up at Alan with a smile.

He looked down at me with that manly glow he carried with him all the time.  I couldnt explain it.  It was like he was some kind of angel or something.  The only other person I had seen with that type of glow was my grandma.  Maybe it was because I adore him just as much as I adored her.  I didnt know for sure.

“Babygirl, youre the best.  Thank you so much.”  I wanted to kiss him, but my breath smelled like cum and I didnt want to burden him with it.

We went in the store hand in hand and bought the ice cream.  On our way out, we met up with one of his friends.  I didnt know his name.  I knew we went to school together, but I didnt know who he was.  He was short and skinny with dark skin and a large nose.  He looked almost nerdy.  My stomach dropped when I saw what he was wearing, a Wendys uniform.

Oh my God.  Was this the guy that saw me naked sucking Alan at the drive through?  Please dont say so.

“Alan!  What up bro?”  They shook hands.

“Nada, bro, just getting some ice cream, you?”

“Mikes brothers pulling out for me.  We came to buy some beer.  Were hanging out tonight.”

“Thats cool, man.”

Just then, the guy caught a glimpse of me standing halfway behind Alan.  He leaned over to get a better look.  “Is that Laura?  You guys hooked up or what?”

“Yeah.”

“Is she the one that…”  It was almost like he didnt want to finish the sentence.

He stopped asking after he saw the look on Alans face.  Alan was smiling from ear to ear.

“Shes the one I saw that night?”

Alan just shrugged his shoulders and nodded.  I hid even more behind him in embarrassment.  I felt totally exposed even though I was dressed.  The humiliation was turning me on pretty bad by now.

He leaned over some more to get a better look at me.  Alan stepped away from me leaving me there for him to see.

“Vince, this is Laura.  You know her.  Shes in your grade.”

Vince, that was his name.  He scaled me up and down licking his lips.

“Thats Laura?”  He checked me out again.  I just stood still letting it happen.  “Holy shit, no way!  Youre looking good, girl.”

Alan put his hand on Vinces shoulder.  “Whoah, bro, hold up.”

“Hey, Im not starting shit, man.  Just paying comps bro.”

“Well, we gotta head out.”

“Yeah, I bet.”  Vince raised his eyebrows as if he knew what we were up to.  They shook hands again and said bye.

We got back in the car. 

“You know that youre mine now, right?”  Alan said.

“Of course.Forever and ever.”

“Im never letting you go, girl.”

“Please dont.”

We made the short trip back to my house.  My mom and dad were still in the den cuddling and watching TV.

We all sat together and ate ice cream.  My parents thanked Alan and we talked for a little while before he had to go.

“Well, its already nine.  I better get going.  Thank you so much for the meal tonight Mr. and Mrs. Garcia.”  He reached his hand out to dad.  Dad stood up and shook his hand.

“Sure thing, youll come over again sometime and do it again.”  I could see in his eyes that my dad really liked him.  It made me feel whole.

Alan gently shook my moms hand and let me walk him out to the front porch.  I wrapped my arms around him and looked deep into his eyes.

“I love you so much, Alan.”  I said sincerely.

“You have no idea, babygirl.”  He answered with a smile.

I tip-toed and planted a soft kiss on his lips and released with a loud smack.

“Goodnight.  Ill call you tomorrow.”  He said.

“Ok, goodnight.”

I had never been so in love in all my life.  My entire body felt like it was having a huge, continuous orgasm of pure joy.  I felt tingly all over.  My head was filled with beautiful thoughts and visions.  It was one of the most wonderful feelings I had ever had in my entire life.

I went back inside.  Mom and dad were picking up the empty bowls of ice cream and putting them in the sink.

“I have to tell you, Laura.  That boy you found theres a good one.”  Mom said.

“Yeah, I really like him a lot.”  Dad stated.

It just made me smile.

“Look at her, hun, shes glowing.”  Mom said.  Dad just nodded and smiled.

“I think someones in love.”  She sang.

“Shut up guys.”  I responded bashfully.

“Yeah, I agree.”  Dad said.

“Im going to bed.  Goodnight mom.”  I kissed her on the cheek.

“Goodnight dad.”  I kissed and hugged him tight before heading straight to my room.

I walked in and shut the door.  I walked over to the edge of my bed and sat down.  My mind was racing with beautiful thoughts of love and flowers and bliss.  My reverie was quickly broken.

What the fuck, slutface?  Why are you still dressed in your dungeon?  Are you retarded or is this your way of asking for a beating?  Take off those clothes now, youre testing my patience, bitch.

The voice had this ability to make me wet immediately.  I had never masturbated while on my period before because it was so messy and I didnt want blood everywhere.  But I always wanted to do it more during those times.  I didnt know if it was because I felt like I couldnt do it, and the denial made me want it more for those three or four days.  I didnt know if the cycle alone made me more horny.  I just know that my sex drive went up during my period but I didnt do it because of the bloody mess.  I always felt so disgusting down there.  Horny, but disgusting.

I stripped off all my clothes.  My stomach was bloated from all the beans I had eaten.  I felt like a little piggy.  My stomach was full.

Lets see if Master left you an email tonight, shitface.

I turned on my computer and let it warm up.  I checked my email right away.  Sure enough, I wasnt let down as there was an email titled “Piece of shit whore.”  I quickly opened the letter.


Dear bitch,

I am sure your pussy and ass are sore right now.  At least thats whats expected after a hard days work of fucking yourself.  In time, you will get used to it.  And since you and been such a good submissive slut, I have decided to give you a day of rest.  However, a day of rest as a sub doesnt mean she gets to fuck around and sleep all day.  You have worked hard in your training and you are coming along nicely. 

Enjoy

Master

A day off?  What kind of pussy gives a whore a day off?  Hes just too fuckin lazy to think of anything new for you to do for him.  Fine, then Ill have to take over from here.  I know what you can take and what your body cant take.  I know what you want deep inside like nobody else.  I know just how sick you are and I plan to use this to my advantage.

I sat at the computer a while looking and saving several BDSM pictures that caught my eye.  I used it mainly to get me in the mood for what I was about to do to myself.  After at least an hour of this, I decided to turn off the computer and start.  Now the only thing I had to work with was myself.  I had to use my own imagination to get myself into a situation that I would enjoy while at the same time be uncomfortable enough to keep me in a submissive state.

Are you ready for this cunt?

I nodded.

First thing, I want you to put on that red silk teddy and your high heels.

I did as I was told.

Good, now put on your ball gag and the butt plug with the tail. 

I put the butt plug in after using some KY to lube it up.  It slid in with a pop as my asshole gladly accepted it by sucking it in.  I felt immediate pleasure from it as the tingles started jumping around my pussy.  It grew damp quickly.

Put your hair back in a ponytail.  We are going out for a walk.

I shook my head, no.  “No way, Im not going out like this.  What if I get caught?”

Who gives a flying fuck about your reputation, whore?  All Im asking for is a quick walk up the street to the corner and back.  I want you to feel the night breeze on your nearly naked skin while you display your sluttiness to the entire world.  Who cares what people think?  You wont be naked, so theres no indecent exposure.  And if a neighbor sees you, so what?  Your parents dont get along with anybody here anyway.  Theyve always felt discriminated in this neighborhood because theyre Hispanic.  Fuck them.

He was right.  I was willing to bet that nobody would even say anything if they saw me.  So why was I feeling so scared to do it?  I crawled out of the house on a leash the other night totally naked and nothing happened.  Whats the worst that could happen?

I put my hair back in a ponytail and quietly removed the screen from my window.  My hands were shaking badly.  I couldnt believe I was doing that.  I could feel embarrassment as I stepped out my window and onto the loose gravel just outside my window.  I pressed myself against the wall of my house next to my window in case I needed to jump in suddenly. 

I took a deep breath and walked quietly and slowly across the gravel to the sidewalk.  I was standing under the bright orange streetlight and for the first time in my life, I felt totally exposed.  I felt like a hooker standing in the corner waiting for a customer.  The cool breeze felt soothing on my naked legs and the cool silk did nothing to stop it from pushing through.  I felt naked even though I wasnt.

Walk all the way to the next street and then turn around and come back.  Keep your hands behind your back so that your titties are pressed out like youre proud to be the neighborhood slut.

I took a deep breath and started walking down the dark street.  It was late and all the houses were dark and it was so quiet, you could hear a pin drop.  The only sounds that were audible were the clamping of my heels with every step I took.  I tried to walk as quietly as I could to not wake anybody up, but I couldnt do it effectively.

As I walked I could feel the tail dangling down and gently brushing against the back of my knees.  The teddy bumped softly against my naked thighs with every step I took.  I felt totally humiliated even though nobody that I knew of was watching me.  I felt exposed and the tail just proved what a total slut I was.

This street had about 6 or 7 houses on both sides of the street.  After that, there was an open field about 100 feet to the corner with a ditch in between.  Just as I reached the last house, I heard a car approaching.  It was still a little ways away, but I could hear the engine and the tires on the pavement.  My heart started pounding and I felt like I was about to have a heart attack.  The car reached the corner of the street where I started my walk and in a sudden panic, I ran into the yard of the last house and squatted down behind a small bush.  It hardly hid me at all, but if they just drove right by, I doubted they would be able to spot me.

What the fuck are you doing, slut?  You like being seen like this, dont you?  Why are you so scared?  Afraid of what might happen?  Get that whorish ass out there and let them see you dressed and walking like a desperate whore.

The car came closer, but I just couldnt bring myself to come out from behind.  My heartbeat made my whole body bounce with every beat and it felt like I held my breath until the car drove right passed me.

You disappoint me, slut.  You will pay for this.  Youll pay dearly.

I didnt care about the punishment; I was safe for the mean time.  I didnt know why I hid, maybe it was pure instinct.  A couple days ago, I had no problem at all crawling out of my house naked.  But now that I was dressed, I couldnt bring myself to do it. 

Its because you had someone to make you obey.  Im just a voice.  If I were here with you physically, I would bet a million bucks you wouldnt have hidden.  See, you need a Master to keep you doing shit you wouldnt normally do on your own.  Thats how pathetic you are.  Get that pathetic, slutty ass out of the bush and finish your fucking whore walk, bitch.

I got out from behind the bush and concentrated on sounds of cars in case I might have to hide myself again.  I got back on the sidewalk and made it all the way to the next corner.  I stood, once again, under the bright street lamp completely visible from all sides.  My pussy was soaking wet by now and I was getting totally horny from this humiliation exercise. 

I turned around and started walking back.  I was walking faster than normal because I was in a hurry to return back to the privacy and safety of my room.

Slow the fuck down, cunt, and walk like a real slut.  One foot in front of the other, very little bounce, and as quietly as you possibly can.  You know how to do it.  If youre going to be a slut, act like one too.

I slowed my pace as I finally made my way all the way back to my own street corner.  A brief moment under the light made my pussy drip with the pleasure of the exposure before I quietly walked back across the gravel and back to my window.  I climbed inside and slowly replaced the screen to my window so I wouldnt wake up the house.  I kept my window open.

Strip, whore.

I took off my clothes and removed the butt plug.

Keep the shoes on.  See the girls on the internet who are getting fucked?  They are true sluts and they keep their heels on all the time.  So you will keep them on.

I was still shaking from the task I had finished.

Do you remember when I said that a true slut is always ready for sex no matter her situation?

“Yes Sir, I do.”

Now, that includes when youre on your period.  Luckily, sluts have several holes to use for the pleasure of men.  If a man thinks that a bloody cunt is disgusting, you can offer your asshole.  If your asshole is too close to that disgusting bloody pussy, then you can offer your mouth.  See, a true slut is useful all the time.  Now get that practice dildo out.

I was so totally soaked and turned on that I didnt hesitate to get the dildo from my toy box.

Tie that dildo on your foot board so that it lines up perfectly with your ass and pussy when youre on your hands and knees.

This proved to be quite challenging.  I had to put the dildo against my butthole and lean back until it touched my foot board.  I held the dildo in position and taped it tightly to the post.  I then assumed the hands and knees position.

I know, youve never had a dick that big inside of you, but a slut doesnt have a choice what goes in her ass.  She accepts it and appreciates being used that way.  So, first, I want you to pour some of that KY on your ass and on the dildo.  I know what you ate today, so this will be messy, but do you think that matters?

“No Sir.”  Tears of both joy and fear filled my eyes.  Why did I always feel so confused when I was doing things like this?  Why didnt I either feel sad or happy?  I was always in limbo.  I poured the KY as I was ordered to do.

Good, now sloooowly lean back into the dildo so that it presses firmly against your gaping ass hole.  Dont push it inside just yet.

I leaned back and felt the head press firmly against my sphincter. 

Now beg the fake dick to fuck your ass.  Dont worry, that butt plug stretched your ass a little, so it wont hurt as bad. 

“Please fuck my ass.”

Now very, very slowly lean back and allow the head to enter your stinking ass.  Hold it there.

I slowly leaned back and held my breath as I felt my ass stretch as it popped into my asshole.  It felt similar to my butt plug, only a little bigger and it stayed stretched more.  I held my position with just the head in it.  I started breathing a little heavier.

Now before you take it all in, thank the dick for fucking your dirty asshole.

“Thank you, dick, for fucking my dirty asshole.”

Now, slowly lean back some more.  Take it slow and steady.  I want you to feel the manhood inside your dirtiest part. 

I slowly made my way further back, feeling the length fill my bowels until I felt a sharp pain, like it had hit a wall.  I stopped.

Relax and hold that position.  Its not very deep right now.  Relax your ass muscles and it will allow it go further in.

I had read about it on the internet.  I knew it was possible to take it all the way in, I just had to relax and accept it.  So I did.  The pain of the wall subsided and I was able to lean all the way back on the dildo until my butt touched the pole.  I felt like I needed to take a huge crap.  It felt like my bowels were full and my butt was stretched.  My pussy felt like it was being tickled from the inside and it made me feel so totally turned on by it even though my ass was in pain.

Keep it in there.  Feel the power that dick has over your body.  Feel the way it fills your insides.  And thank it for training your ass to give pleasure.

“Thank you for training my ass to give pleasure.”  I grunted in discomfort and pleasure at the same time.

At your own pace, start pumping your ass in and out.  Dont let the head come out.  Do this until I tell you to stop.

I started pulling it out slowly until I felt the head wanting to pop out.  Then I slowly pushed it all the way back in.  I did this several times successfully.  The pain made me feel good.  I was receiving pleasure from it.  Not like an orgasmic pleasure, but it felt really good.  Like foreplay almost.

After about five minutes of doing this, I felt my ass start to hurt both inside and out.  It was more of a soreness than a sharp pain.

Thats good enough, cunt.

I leaned forward and with a final thrust, allowed the head to pop out of my asshole.

Oh, my god, look at that dildo.

The dildo was streaked with brown filth that seemed to gather around the head.  It had a foul sex and shit odor to it.  It made me feel nasty and dirty.  It made me feel like a desperate slut.  It turned me on to the point of no return.  I was in a daze and I was going to make it worse just for the sake of being degraded further.

Now comes the nasty part.  Take out your tampon and fuck that dildo with your bloody pussy. 

I couldnt bring myself to do it.  It was disgusting.  I felt so dirty in my pussy when I was bleeding.  But I wanted to fuck something so bad at the same time.  I was stuck.

If youre not going to fuck that dildo with your pussy, youll be forced to do something so disgusting, you will probably throw up from it.  Now get that pussy wrapped around that waiting dick.  If youre gonna be real slut, you will have to get used to doing this, cunt.  Now fuck that dildo NOW!

I closed my eyes tightly and with a large lump in my throat I leaned back and pushed myself to allow the dildo to slide into my dirty sex hole.  I popped in with a loud smack. 

Now fuck that dick like you want it. While you fuck it, I want to hear you calling out all the dirty names youve called yourself.  You will mean everything you say.  And you will not cum until Im satisfied with you.

I leaned further back allowing the dirty dildo to fuck my bloody pussy.  I hated it and loved it at the same time.  The humiliation of fucking a dirty dildo while on my period overpowered my disgust for myself.  It was like I lost all control over myself and the hornier I got, the more extreme I got.  I was willing to do much more than I normally would when I was this horny.  I would do anything for the thrill of it.  It was the ultimate foreplay.

I started fucking the dildo with joy and pleasure.  I immediately felt the desire to cum just from the thought that I was fucking a shit stained dick.  The thought that I was using my pussy against my normal will to please something that doesnt even have a brain, sent shocks of pleasure through my entire body.

“Im a dirty whore.  Im a slut.  Im a tramp.”  The words made me want to orgasm even more.  I didnt know if I could hold it anymore.  “Im a pig.  Im a worthless piece of shit.  Im a pissface.  Im a stupid cunt.  Im a piece of meat.  Im a stupid whore.  Im a horny bitch.  Im a desperate slut and whore.”  I felt a wave of pleasure fill my body and settle on the nerves that brought me orgasmic joy.  I couldnt take it anymore, I needed to cum so bad.  I couldnt stop.  I couldnt take it anymore.  The orgasm was starting and every muscle in my body tensed.

Get off that dildo before you finish cunt!  GET OFF NOW or you will be made to suck that dirty tampon and put it back in your stinking pussy.  STOP NOW!!!!!

It took every single cell of my will to get me to stop and pull out of that dildo.  I collapsed my head down to the floor and gasped for air with a soft cry.  Tears dripped to the wood floor below my face.  Waves of pleasure pulsated throughout my entire body but I felt no climax at all.  I felt so desperate and so hungry for orgasm that I sobbed on the floor.

Looks like you made the dick cum before you, cunt.  Looks like you are going to have to wait to get pleasure.  Maybe next time you will learn to cum when he cums.  Does my little slave slut want to cum really bad?

“Yes, Sir, I want to cum so bad.  Fuck! Please let me cum Sir.”

Ok, Ill let you cum. BUT the only way Ill allow you to cum is if you suck that dildo clean while you rub that nasty pussy of yours until you orgasm.  You will hold your orgasm until that dildo is totally clean.  If you cant hold it until then, you will stop rubbing until it starts to fade a little.  Then you will start rubbing again.  When you finally orgasm, I want that dildo so far down your tight throat, you cant even breath just like the gagging girls on the internet. Its the only way Im gonna allow you to cum tonight.  Or you wait until next time you get a chance.  I doubt Alans gonna want to fuck a bleeding pussy.

Shit!  The voice was right.  The constant tingling in my body made my mind race and take all my inhibitions and throw them out.  My mind was on one thing.  Getting pleasure no matter what it took.  It was my main priority for that short time.  I turned around held my breath so I wouldnt have to smell the shit and menstrual covered dildo sticking out of my foot board.  I closed my eyes and stuck out my tongue.  I gagged as I rubbed the nasty dildo on my tongue.

Dont you dare throw up, cunt.

I took my mind off of the fact that I was tasting shit and blood and focused on the fact that I was going to be allowed an orgasm.  I reached down between my legs and started rubbing my clit vigorously.  Thick, sticky goo covered the entire mound.  It was covered with my blood and my own arousal fluids.  I pumped my head up and down, gagging as the taste filled my entire mouth.  I was so fucking desperate, I was actually willing to do this just to earn an orgasm?  What the hell was wrong with me? 

My taste buds went numb as I got closer to orgasm once again.  I pulled the dildo out of my mouth to inspect how clean I had made it.  There were still a few streaks of shit and red blood just under the tip.  As I felt the wave of orgasm fill my soul once again, I used my tongue to clean below the head of the dildo.  I had lowered myself to the point of cleaning shit off a dick and that alone took me to one of the most intense and satisfying masturbation orgasms I had ever had.

Now, we all know the difference between an actual orgasm and one you get from masturbating.  They are similar, but not the same.  Real orgasms lasted longer and felt better, masturbating was satisfying but quick and not quite as intense.  I had the latter of the two but it was the best one I had ever had.  My cunt juice even dripped to the floor between my knees.  My hand was covered in my own filth.  I was so completely disgusted.

You are such a dirty little cunt, arent you?

“Yes Sir.”

Take that dildo and put it away, then I want you to come back and lick that little puddle of pussy juice from the floor.  Then, you can replace your tampon before we get you ready for bed.

I dont know why I had acted so disgusting.  Later in my life I realized why.  I found out that when I was being teased and denied orgasm, my imagination took complete control of my body and I allowed myself to do much more extreme tasks.  I was willing to do just about anything to get that climax.  I didnt care what it was.  My mind would leave all my norms behind and my primary focus was to complete my task for my reward.  I felt like an animal in training performing tricks to get a treat.

I undid my dildo and put it away.  I crawled back to the small puddle of cunt juice that shimmered on the floor.  I didnt want to lick it up at that time and I blamed it on the fact that I had already had my orgasm.  I was done.  But I forced myself to lean down, hold my breath, and suck up the nasty fluid from the floor.

It was the nastiest thing I had done so far in my life.  I didnt know if I would ever be willing to do it again.  I felt like I was mentally ill.  Why would I do that to myself?  How sick was I?  At the same time, if I needed help, how would I explain it to my parents?  This was something I would have to try to figure out myself.

I was crying at my own disgrace by the time I finished licking up my own filth.  I tossed my dirty tampon in my trash can and put in a clean one.  I then put a maxi pad in my panties and put them on.  I always did this before bed just in case I had a heavy flow and the pad was just extra so my sheets wouldnt stain.

For some strange reason, after I was finished doing all that, I looked for the voice but it wasnt there.  I stood beside my comfortable bed staring at it for a moment.  I hadnt slept in it in a little over a week.  I missed my bed.  I figured that as a reward, I should be allowed to sleep in the bed that night.

I opened the covers and sheets and crawled in.  I pulled the blankets over my body and I felt the cool comfort of my sheets blanket my skin.  I hadnt even used blankets the past week either.  It felt really nice.  I lied there on my back, staring at the ceiling.  This strange feeling came over me.  It was confusing at the time.  But I felt kind of guilty for lying down on the bed.  I felt like I didnt really belong there.  Perhaps I had conditioned myself to accept the floor as my sleeping area.  Maybe I didnt feel worthy of a bed.  But it felt so nice and I was so comfortable.  I turned out my light and fell asleep as soon as my head rested on my pillow.  It was the deepest, most satisfying night of sleep I had had in a while.  I did deserve that.  I had earned that.  I was happy.



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