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The Bondage Room
Author: Yessir
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(Added on Jun 28, 2007)
(This month 11080 readers) (Total 24528 readers) |
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A couple has built a room in their home to be used as a dungeon. This is the night they use it for the first time and His subbie has no idea what she's in for. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 4 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (7/10) |
Average
Rating:  (7.5/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (8/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (6/10) |
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| Reviewer:
heycarrieanne
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 30, 2007 |
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You can't write a story in the past using present tense. Also, if you are going to have two people telling the story, you need to figure out a way to separate their stories. (6/10)
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| Reviewer:
s1xer
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 30, 2007 |
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Enjoyed it,a good start to a longer story. I have to agree with previous reviewer about writing using second person. (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
chksng19
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 30, 2007 |
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A lovely start to the story, although using the second person makes it difficult in places for you to keep things moving, it seems.
I hope there is much more! (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 28, 2007 |
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good start hope you ad more (7/10)
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